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About Deviant Artist RiaFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 10 Years
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I feel...
I feel...
Out of touch.
Trapped in a black hole.
Cold hands grasp my spirit,
They won't let go.
They want to drag me down.
They want me to suffer.
I'm not a bad person.
That's all I know how to say.
That's all my mind lets me believe.
I don't like to feel pain.
I don't like to be alone.
But all of find is hurt.
All I find is loneliness.
What illness plagues me so?
I am not depressed.
I don't know who I'm supposed to be.
This isn't a phase. I am not an insect that will transform into a beautiful creature.
But I hate this life too much to change.
Why does hate keep me from changing? Is this really the way of the world...
To not love you?
To abandon you?
To leave you in your own hell.
I wish to change my life.
But I've no idea where to turn.
Maybe I should just stop wandering to find the answers.
Maybe I should just stand still and wait for them to come to me.
Maybe I should just stop running.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 1 1
Coexist by AirWolfDemon Coexist :iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 12 7
Beyond the Crimson Shadows
Oh, she withered in the darkness,
But she stayed; she stayed.
Her heart would not let her leave
Even if she desired to.
She counted all the years that passed
In a day.
She still did not leave.
She opened up her heart to love.
She gave away her soul
To that
Stranger in the alleyway,
So charming that no one
Could resist.
She found, as the days wore on,
How tiring the endless sea of shadows
Could become,
And she wondered
Where it had all gone.
The light, that is.
Where the light had gone.
She held tight to that stone she wore
Close to her heart,
And wished for better days.
In a valiant effort to save her,
A man mimicking the pure white of
An angel's wings
Swept down into her life.
The darkness was displeased.
That stranger in the alleyway sat in rage.
He let his fury seethe until he could no longer endure it.
Unleashed, he became a
New kind of monster, or demon, if you will.
The light no longer making even the smallest imprint on his
Altered soul.
He basked in the glow of that crimson moo
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 0
The Burden of a Life
When you're responsible for a life,
For a soul,
Everything seems more fragile.
Every morning you wake up, you are grateful,
Especially when they wake up too.
In the evenings, you ponder
The events of the day.
You struggle to find the answers to their hurt,
But you never succeed.
You try to hold them when they cry,
But they push you away.
You can never let them know that you hurt inside,
Because they hurt inside, too.
They disregard the fact that people love them,
Including you. No matter
How many times you tell them,
They always have that cursed doubt
Creeping in through the back of their mind.
Oh, how you wish you could save them;
Free them from their perpetual agony.
But you've tried everything.
You're at the end of your rope.
So when they ask for that oblivion.
When they ask.
Do you give it to them?
Or do you force them to go on,
While watching them deteriorate from their
Internal exile?
Whichever you choose,
Hold onto them.
Hold on tight.
For that is the last expression of love the
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 0
Aphotic Love
"Write the world a new song
And hold my hand close to your heart.
I promise you, the light won't
Leave you behind.
Open up
And let your dreams soar high.
Let the mind drift away
Into the red-moon corridors."
Soft, a silhouette comes creeping
Down the alley.
With mourning wails it screams
"Stay" into the night.
A broken wing drags
Heavily on the frost-bitten ground.
The ice aches and gives way to the warm redness.
Shivers, never ceasing,
Break down the soul
That so questions its existence.
Chaos engulfs logical thoughts
And warps beliefs into distant convictions.
A silhouette stretches madly across the blackened sky.
No stars to be seen; no stars.
Only the red moon illuminating an immense, aphotic room.
No more,
No more flight.
It circles and fervently waits
For the night it's
Sempiternal love
Will return.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 2
I Am His Shadow
I am his shadow.
I follow him wherever he goes.
But he'll never know,
That I'm his shadow.
I am his wings.
I fly for him.
I help his spirit soar high.
I watch through his eyes,
But see nothing,
For they are not mine.
I am his silent observer,
Paying careful attention to small phrases
That break hearts.
I am his healer.
I fix and mend his spirit when it shatters.
I hold him close to my heart when he's sad.
I am his savior.
For he is the boy that runs
In front of that car
And doesn't notice until it is
Too late.
I am his shadow.
I walk alone in silence.
I hold his head high.
I slowly flit through his wondrous mind.
He turns around.
I am his shadow.
He looks on, but now smiles as he walks.
I am his shadow?
I am his shadow.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 0
To Write Love
will these old wounds ever heal?
i'm afraid to let go.
if i do, will you still be here?
i can't do this alone.
please walk with me through the dark.
there's still hope in my soul.
i'm sure i'll make it through tomorrow.
but is that how it's supposed to be?
Save me.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 1 0
Bitter Patience
I don't want to be bitter anymore.
Can't you see what it's done to my soul?
This never-ending hatred burns me from the inside
With its unforgiving flame.
I'm not sure of how much more I can take.
I wait inside my mind for everything to change.
It all stays the same.
Whenever I wake up, the hatred appears to remind me
That it woke up too.
It creeps into my heart sometimes,
And I become a malicious animal,
Unwilling to be kind and fiercly stubborn.
I would do anything for hate.
Yet the sun still comes up.
The hatred often pulls me from it.
But I strive on, hoping that its rays could reach my
Already bound soul.
Again, this is a problem that tests my patience.
It seems that all of them have been like that these days.
Yes, I'm tired of waiting. Yes, I just want to give up.
But I can't. So, patience it is.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 0
While I Return
While I sat and wondered if I did the right thing,
You stared at your computer screen,
Waiting for an answer.
While I danced so freely in your arms,
I wondered which heart I was breaking,
So I held on tighter, hoping that you'd
Somehow chase away the pain.
While I cried myself to sleep over some
Stupid exchange of words that really
Had no meaning, you
Seemed to understand and continued to wait.
While I thought about the past and I wondered
How it would have been, I regret
Being impatient; it is an obvious flaw of mine
That I must fix.
While I asked you how I could make it right,
I thought to myself, do you really know?
And I played your answer over and over again in my head
Until it made so little sense that I understood it.
So I will go by your answer
And not be afraid as you wished,
But only as long as you'll be waiting for me
While I return.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 4
New Days
New days bring new change,
And change is what I like;
It shoves away the old and brightens
Blue skies
Making everything
And the sun's rays suddenly seem to reach
Where they couldn't reach before,
And heavy hearts awaken,
Loving the sunrise instead of
Dreading the morning skies.
A clear breeze blows through
Strands of hair and
Sifts through memories
Left untended,
While the Earth seems to absorb
All the troubles and
Negative space.
Every soul wants to live where
New days
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 4
The Realist
I dreamt of days still to come
But, much to my dismay,
The world of dreams became reality,
And here I sit,
Numb and feeling strangely odd
At events that caused my
Even with the warning,
My oblivious eyes and hopeful heart
Shut out the bad and
Convinced my soul
To stay
The Optimist.
Talking was the ultimate regret
When my lips should have kept themselves shut.
From my mind, to my fingers, through the keys,
To the screen, posted words that made phrases,
Soiling thoughts and dreams.
I wonder how it would have been
If I met the expectations.
My silent mind was never able to reach
Far enough, fast enough, to keep up with
The demands.
What thousands of years of pain has taught me
Is to become whatever fits your soul
And not what fits the soul next to you,
Or the soul down the street,
Or the soul that you want.
To become The Pessimist,
The Optimist,
Or The Realist,
Will forever write the story of your downfall.
Until the end,
Which is where I wait now,
My decision is final;
I am
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 3
Perpetual Melody
Hey there, I have missed you so.
The shadows on the walls creep into
Broken thoughts,
Corrupting words of memories
I'd forgotten.
You always knew
Which way the wind would blow,
Even on the darkest days.
And when you left, this old, abandoned lot
Never seemed the same.
But still, the birds sing midnight songs
To welcome you through
Scattered trees and
Sunny skies.
And even for all the years you were gone,
They'd never forget
your melody.
:iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 2
Ammy -Amaterasu- from Okami by AirWolfDemon Ammy -Amaterasu- from Okami :iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 2 9 White Shepherd Dog by AirWolfDemon White Shepherd Dog :iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 0 0 Vulpes vulpes by AirWolfDemon Vulpes vulpes :iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 1 0 Howling Wolf -uncolored- by AirWolfDemon Howling Wolf -uncolored- :iconairwolfdemon:AirWolfDemon 1 7


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The Still
The natural light has been flushed out;
Not a creature shuffles about.
The sea of darkness causes fright;
I sing alone at this time at night.
You cannot hear me,
You cannot see me,
You cannot stop me,
You can't come near me.
The air and thoughts and smells are dead;
Though the wind still pulls you far ahead.
I am the still and the absence of light;
I sing alone at this time of night.
You cannot hear me,
You cannot see me,
You cannot stop me,
You can't come near me.
You cannot touch me,
You can't embrace me,
You cannot taste me,
You can't deface me.
I am the wind that swallows you whole,
I am the smell of dead air and mold;
I am the dark murky unmoving water,
And you are the dense pleasant smell I create.
I am the still and the absence of light,
And I sing alone at this time of night.
:iconcirculate:circulate 0 23
West Winds by circulate West Winds :iconcirculate:circulate 3 23
I hold onto this memorabilia.
I was here---
And in the farthest depths of my mind,
I will continue to be.
:iconcirculate:circulate 0 7



United States
Current Residence: the sky
Favourite genre of music: hard rock and some types of metal
Favourite photographer: Jasper James
Favourite style of art: drawing
Operating System: Vista
MP3 player of choice: Omnitech
Favourite cartoon character: Toboe
Personal Quote: I'm always late, but I never forget.
  • Listening to: Run - Disturbed
  • Reading: nothing
  • Watching: some random show on TV
  • Playing: nothing
  • Eating: cereal
  • Drinking: OJ
Well, I've certainly been writing a lot more poetry lately. =]  I'll be pretty busy with school and such, though, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to submit anything for December. =

Anways, I'm totally psyched! I tried out for Senior Districts (a select singing group thing) and I made it! I've just started practicing the music for it, and I'm thrilled because one of the songs is in Russian! =D

Other than that, nothing else has happened.

Oh, and I hope that everyone (who celebrates it) had a wonderful Thanksgiving! **GOBBLE** =P


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ambrxsius Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL HAI. I see you're still sick, i guess, since you're not in school.. >>

BrannaPants Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
awesome work!
AirWolfDemon Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2009
Thank you! =D
BrannaPants Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
your welcome
Wolf250 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thank you for the watch :)
Tassy Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2008  Professional General Artist
Thanks for the watch! :glomp:
AirWolfDemon Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2008
ur welcome! =D
AddictedToSkittles Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2008
thankyou for the fave :hug:
AirWolfDemon Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2008
ur welcome! <3 =D
Silver--Chan Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2008
Haiii! :D

My old account died. :P If you dont know who this is I will EAT J00! >D

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